15 Ways to De-Stress When Pandemic Fatigue Sets In

When feelings of frustration, disappointment, or upset show up when your thoughts turn to the upcoming holidays, recognize that these are all normal reactions to a very abnormal situation. The world shifted and social connections have been disrupted and even our “kith and kin” are being warned off of extended family gatherings. We’ve made it through all four seasons, now, of the pandemic and this holiday season is likely going to be the biggest test, and sadly, perhaps the biggest failure of our ability to keep our social distance, wear our masks around others, and avoid crowded places—even the kitchens of the people we care most about who don’t share our living quarters.

  1. Ask for help if you’re feeling overwhelmed. It really is OK to be needy! Neediness isn’t a bad thing in itself; being too proud or too stubborn to ask for help is when emotional neediness becomes a serious liability.

  2. Know that holidays are going to be different. Don’t focus on what you cannot enjoy, but be grateful for the positive events that do occur. Treats and gifts that you send through the mail or drop off on a porch are going to be the sunshine in someone else’s day—even if you can’t be present to offer a big hug along with the gift.

  3. Don’t sweat the small stuff—ever! It’s never worth the energy it takes and it gets your focus off of the “big stuff” that can affect you in ways that the “small stuff” cannot.

  4. Everyone is likely to feel a little out-of-sorts this holiday season, so do what you can to keep the peace where you can. Don’t tread near dangerous, inflammatory topics, and don’t tease people who can’t take teasing. Be thoughtful of others’ feelings so that they will also be thoughtful of yours.

  5. Plan for the holiday. Write down what you want to accomplish, contact the people you want to virtually gather with, and make a plan. Not only will this ensure that you have time to do the things you want to do, but it also gives you something to look forward to!

  6. Boundaries. Learn to say “no,” and remind yourself that it’s OK to do so. Budget your spending and your time and your energy!

  7. Build R&R into every day. Stress that builds up day after difficult day can become like a weight around your heart. By finding time each day to open your “emotional release valve,” you’ll be in better overall shape each new day.

  8. Take a hot bath or shower. Literally washing off the day gives you space to metaphorically wash away the stress and frustration and hurt and anger that may be prickling around somewhere inside.

  9. Expend energy. Whether you hop on a treadmill, go for a run in the brisk outdoors, or bench-press away the weight of the challenges you’re facing. Our bodies were made to move—muscles atrophy if we don’t use them, so heal your body by keeping it moving. Exercise also serves as a great natural detoxifier—it gets rid of lactic acid in our muscles, but also it rids our minds of negative feelings and anger by stimulating the feel-good hormones like dopamine and endorphins.

  10. Change your scenery. Get outside! Or, at the least, bring nature and plants into your home if it’s too cold to get outside.

  11. Take a nap. But don’t sleep away your leisure time.

  12. Warm-up your heart with a warm mug in your hands. Just holding a warm mug can be soothing and stress relieving—even if it’s just a mug of hot water. Kind of like a hot shower—warmth triggers relaxation.

  13. Hug someone if you’re quarantining with others. Holding someone close is like a magic drug that lowers our blood pressure and our heart rate, enhances our natural painkilling abilities, and is healing.

  14. If you’re feeling tied up in stress knots or dealing with unspecific frustration or negative feelings, find a creative outlet to express yourself in a non-verbal manner. Sometimes we don’t have the words to express or even think through some feelings, so finding a way to draw, dance, sing out the feelings can provide the release that we need to get back to a state of equilibrium.

  15. Meditate. And if you think you just don’t know how, just sit quietly, close your eyes, and let the thoughts drop out of you head as if they were drops of rain from a cloud, or imagine free throw after free throw swishing into the basket, if you’re a basketball fan, or simply sit and silently tell yourself, “Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out,” after you set a timer on your cellphone for two or three minutes as you work up "meditation stamina" and aim for 10 or 15 minutes or more, over time.

By Suzanne Degges-White, Ph.D.