How to Have a More Mindful Holiday Season

However you celebrated last year’s winter holidays, chances are good that you weren’t trying to avoid a global pandemic. Now, as you shop for gifts, get out your grandmother’s recipes, or make plans for spiritual observance, current events might have you asking, “What’s the point?”

But change gives us a chance to mix things up — to change our mindset.

So even though this year’s holiday limitations may be difficult, you can also take the opportunity to become more mindful about your celebrations. What do you really enjoy doing during the holidays? What do you always do, but actually hate?

Four Tips for New Traditions

Here are several new traditions you might want to start this year.

1. Move into the slow lane of life.

The COVID-19 pandemic means many regular activities are canceled or held online. This may give you and your family some time to relax. Baking treats for every neighbor on the street isn’t a good idea when we’re trying to avoid the spread of germs. So, put together a few of your favorite cookies for yourself and the family, then call it a day. If there is a lonely neighbor or relative you usually take care of, set up a way to touch base with them virtually. Do an outdoor project if the weather allows, read a book aloud to your kids, or treat yourself to a movie marathon.

2. Customize the holiday menu.

Do you prefer traditional Persian foods to turkey and stuffing? Try a rice dish instead of the traditional bread stuffing. Go vegetarian — or replicate the original turkey meal with chicken or venison if you have a source of wild game.

If you’re celebrating with just immediate family, changing up the traditional menu may be easier. You can choose less expensive options, which can be a relief if budgets are tight. Set up an attractive eating area.

If you’re celebrating alone, you can still light a few candles and prepare a dish you love. Or support a local restaurant by ordering takeout. Most communities have at least some restaurants open on the holidays.

3. Reset your body rhythms and de-stress.

Don’t have 23 relatives coming over? This could be your year to finally sleep in on the holiday. Do you miss the shopping, cooking, and other preparations? Take a walk instead or indulge in some uninterrupted yoga or time in the garden.

I have been out planting bulbs more than ever this year, ready for the spring bloom. One time an older Chinese woman (who spoke no English) walked by. Seeing me planting bulbs, she got so excited that she was soon pointing out (from a distance) where I should plant them and in what pattern. I gave her several bulbs for her trouble, after which we both smiled and bowed. This will be a new ritual for me now.

Our animal companions are often neglected or stressed when human holiday guests visit. If 2020 is a quiet year due to COVID-19, this could be a good year to take a hike with your dog, cuddle with your cat, let the hamster ball roll all over the house (shoot some video!), or even adopt a new pet.

4. Accept that this year is different.

If necessary, repeat to yourself, “This year is different, and that’s OK.” Or even, “This year is different, and that stinks!” Acceptance and commitment therapy is a mindfulness-based approach that helps you deal with reality even when it’s challenging, and helps you reboot your mindset.

Physically distant yet socially connected

Many have discussed the potential pitfalls of loneliness and social isolation. The distancing required to slow the spread of COVID-19 can lead to mental and emotional challenges, including depression.

You may be weary from online socializing, but it can still lift your spirits, especially at a time of year when you are thinking of family and friends. You can use Zoom, Facebook Messenger, FaceTime, or one of the other video calling technologies available to get together even if you’re physically distant. You can also “attend” religious services together. Many houses of worship are live-streaming their regular services, so family members and friends can watch from separate locations while enjoying the rituals and messages together.

Finally, remember that you can use good old-fashioned snail mail to stay connected. Sending care packages can lift the recipient’s spirits — and yours, as you enjoy shopping for small items to include, packing, and mailing your goodies. You can rally family members to donate to a charity for the holidays to create a sense of connection and meaning. Find more tips at Verywell Family for ways to stay connected while you’re physically distant.

Specific tips for mindful holidays

  • Write in a journal. Try one or more of these 15 Journaling Exercises to Help You Heal, Grow, and Thrive.

  • Plan your menu, but ask yourself: Is this really what we like? Choose the foods you or your family would truly enjoy. If you are preparing food to share with people outside your household, check out these tips.

  • Get outdoors! Let this be the holiday you exercise instead of bemoaning how stuffed you are.

  • Finally, try our Happy Holidays tool to discover how you really want to observe the holidays you enjoy most.

Remember that one of the most universally beneficial emotions all humans can find and spread is gratitude. The holidays are largely about finding gratitude. So this holiday, seek out and do those things you most love and appreciate.

By Wayne Jonas, M.D.