4 Pieces of Standard Career Advice That Require More Nuance

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Yesterday, I gave a talk to young adults that explained why some conventional career advice requires more nuance.

“Value positivity. Dismiss naysayers.”

We live in an era in which praise is often given, criticism withheld. But we benefit from both. Trying to succeed with just praise is like trying to win a boxing match with one arm tied behind your back.

So, ask people you respect for suggestions for improvement. You might even ask about your weaknesses even if they're tough to improve. For example, let’s say you’re an intense person. That’s a foundational personality characteristic that’s difficult to change. But it helps to know that about yourself so you can put yourself in situations that skirt that weakness, for example, solo activities.

"Use career guides and software to pick a career"

Sure, career guides and software expose you to lots of careers that you wouldn’t have thought of, and in the case of software, match you to good fits. The problem is that those tools too rarely suggest careers for which you have door-opening connections. And if you have to compete for such careers without connections, your chances of landing a good job aren't so great.

Unless you find a career that is quintessentially you, for example you know you want to be a psychotherapist, your prospects of career contentment may be better if you ask your family, friends, and alumni connections for a not-too-specific career lead, for example, “I’m a people person. Might you know someone who might want to hire me or offer me an internship?” Of course, if you’re not a “people person,” substitute the one or two of the following that best describe you: fix-it, build-it person, analytical type, artistic, entrepreneurial, or office detail.

Your network is unlikely to give you a lead on a “cool” career, for example, in the entertainment or fashion business. Few people have such leads. The good news though is that career contentment is less likely to accrue from "cool" careers, where competition is fierce, than from a less sexy job with a good boss, reasonable job stability, ethical and important work, learning opportunities, decent pay and commute. And unless you’re a star, you’re more likely to get a good launchpad job in a career through connections, even if, off the shelf, the job or career doesn’t sound so great, for example, some nondescript job in a company, nonprofit, or government. It will help to tailor the job to your strengths and skirt your weaknesses, for example, more or less people contact, involvement with the computer, attention to detail, etc.

You might wonder, if you make your ask so general—for example, a job for a people person—won't it make the networking contact feel you haven't sufficiently thought through your career choice? Or that your ask is so vague as to not trigger any ideas for leads? Or that you haven't indicated enough strengths to justify a referral? All those are true, but getting more specific inheres too great a set of liabilities:

  • The more specific you are, say, beyond “people person” the less likely someone is to have a lead for you.

  • Especially in a young adult, whatever additional ability is mentioned, for example, “good at persuasion” is too unlikely to be so excellent as to influence the referrer, even assuming s/he has a portfolio of possible leads to consider.

  • Any additional criterion you include is less likely to be central to career contentment. Let's say, you say, "I'm good at persuasion." You might well be happy in a people-centric career even if persuasion isn't key to that career.

  • Few people, especially young adults, have enough accurate self-knowledge to assess whether they should tout that in their pitch.

So, when day is done, you're wiser to make your ask only minimally specific.

“You’re young, so you have plenty of time to choose a career”

Fact is, changing careers is more difficult than many people realize. You'd need to take the time and usually money to retrain, forgo income while training, and then, now older, compete for jobs with people who have experience. It’s usually wiser to throw yourself fully into your first career and, as mentioned, adapt it to fit your strengths, weaknesses, and preferences.

"Weed is legal so it’s okay"

Yes, in many jurisdictions, marijuana is legal, but like cigarettes, its dangers to health are greater than you've been led to believe. The marijuana corporations (often owned by tobacco companies) and their PR firms get their pro-pot message trumpeted in major media. Fact is, there’s good and increasing data from top-university research to suggest that marijuana has serious dangers: decreased IQ, memory, and motivation, and increased risk of depression and social anxiety. It increases cancer and cardiovascular risk even among the young.

The takeaway

An old cliche is that youth is wasted on the young. I hope these ideas will help you ensure that your youth isn't wasted on you.

Update: A commenter who listened to my reading aloud of this recommended adding a 5th piece of standard career advice that requires nuance: The exhortation to "network, network, network" applies less to people who are poor at it, are in a new locale, or have a very small network.


Marty Nemko, Ph.D.